Yesterday we talked about Processing Suicide. Today I want to talk about Processing Regret. All of us make mistakes. That's what life's for - so we can learn, grow and progress. Regret is natures way of letting us know we made a bad decision. Yet regret can hold us back and prevent us from moving forward. Processing regret is important.
They used to say suicide was a sin and people who commit suicide go to hell. That is ridiculous. God is a God of compassion and understanding. He knows and understands our struggles. He encourages us to overcome our struggles yet he's not going to punish us for giving up. However, if we do give up we will have regrets. That's unavoidable. So processing that regret helps us move forward because life does not end at death.
The thing that struck me about the funeral yesterday was what a nice guy he was. He wasn't the kind of person that would want to hurt anyone especially those he loved and cared about. Sometimes when the dark clouds of discouragement engulf us it's difficult to see anything else. It's hard to see the sun shining behind the dark clouds because all we can see is the dark clouds. Yet stepping back and putting things into perspective helps us see the big picture.
The young man's younger sister spoke and you could tell she was devastated. She said her older brother was more of a father figure than a brother because he filled that role when their father left them. She said when she was young her older brother would often pick her up from school when her mother was unable to and that he assured her he would beat up any guy that harassed her. He was buff, he was noble and he was good.
Yet his suicide is going to deeply impact his younger sister and I see that as a regret. He's obviously going to feel very bad about that. He did not want to hurt her. Yet he did.
His sister needs to know it was not her fault. Everyone makes a choice and everyone accepts responsibility for that choice. When people get discouraged and give up, they're not trying to hurt anyone else. This young man went out of his way to systematically tell people he cared about how much he loved and appreciated them specifically so they wouldn't blame themselves.
Mental health struggles are very real and it's not our place to judge. We simply support and encourage whenever we can. I remember hearing of a young man who committed suicide once. He and his father previously tried to commit suicide together but were unsuccessful so he ended up trying again on his own and succeeded. That's pretty tragic. Again mental heath is something we cannot judge but parents are supposed to encourage their kids to overcome their problems not give in to them. Extending medically assisted suicide to everyone under the sun is pure evil. It's just part of their depopulation agenda.
I knew a guy who had a daughter but moved away after his break up with her mother. It was really hard for him. His ex kept trashing him in front of their daughter so he finally moved away so he could remove himself from the equation. Nothing he did was good enough so he left. Obviously the daughter felt abandoned but she needs to know it wasn't her fault and it wasn't because her father didn't care. He did. He just gave up fighting with her mother. She became pretty bitter about him leaving and stopped talking to him. He obviously regrets that but saw it as a no win situation. One of the ways we process regret is by looking at the big picture.
We move forward by learning from our mistakes. Another factor is substance use. Drugs are bad and make us do thing we wouldn't normally do. Promoting substance use is a bad thing to do. The Liberal lunatics that want to extend MAIDS to the drug addicted after they promoted their drug abuse in the first place don't care about their well being.
They never did.
Whole heartedly agree. To me, regret ranks along side with shame and stigma. When our parents taught us those emotions it was a life long learning skill to get us to productive, contributory human beings. The age old advice, we are to learn from our mistakes so as not to repeat them - like history.
ReplyDeleteI think sorrow has its time and place. We can't change the past but we can change the future. "No matter what you're past, you have a spotless future." The future is a blank canvas. What we put on it is our choice. Dwelling on the poast can rob our future.
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